Days without daddy- week 2

July 15th, 2008 Tuesday

I wish that I could go to bed earlier but I have to put both of them to sleep. Benjamin didn't sleep well and Arthur wake me up at 6am. He had bleeding nose again. My grandma made a red quilt for my mom. My mom left it with me on her last trip. Arthur loves that quilt so much. It is very soft and warm. I told him to hug it but not to put it on himself but he always put all quilts especially that warm red quilt on himself. He did it last night and it was a hot day. I took that quilt away from him and put it in the closet. It also got his peepee with it. I don't know how to wash it since it is made of cotton and some camel wool as my mom told me.

I usually have some free time to think on the bus. I have thanked my sons for the happiness that they brought for a thousand times. They fill in the holes in my life and in my heart. I enjoy it so much of having them. Sometimes I imagine what to do if I get pregnant again. After we had Benjamin, we missed the life that we can't have since we spend all our extra money on Benjamin. Actually he is more expensive than our expectation. We have to hire a nanny for him and that cost us a lot. Once I see his happy face, my plan for taking Arthur to travel around the world just doesn't seem to be attractive any more. I believe that Arthur will cherish his brother more than the memory of going to some weird place and see some weird people.

Arthur got used to the life without dad. Last week, he will mention his dad in a sudden. For example, he will say:"My dad will bring me present" when he is eating; say ''My dad wear white" when he sees someone passed by; say "I don't wake my dad up, he is sleeping" when he is upstairs. He doesn't say something like these this week.

July 18th, Friday
Arthur had fever on Thursday. He had three accidents and wet his underwears. I kept on asking him to drink water at the same time. Benjamin was doing fine. Arthur had lower fever this morning and I still send him to school. We saw his picture from a natural class and he was sitting there with a big snake on his lap and over his neck. He was so happy!

July 20th, Sunday
I took them to Descondo garden on Saturday. Arthur loves the vegetable garden a lot. Arthur slept for the whole afternoon. He was such a nice boy after Benjamin went to bed at night. I haven't seen such a sweet Arthur for a long time.

I took them to the Balboa park this morning. We bought some vegetable from the local farm.